Real world rides, real world riders

Neigh serf, know thy place...

Four times in the past hour I’ve gone out of my way to be uber considerate to people on the road who shouldn’t be there, have no rights to be there and don’t pay to be there. Four times I’ve hauled up the Triumph and gone out of my way to be polite and courteous and not once – not. bloody. once – did any of them go as far as to respond in a positive way.

Not a nod of thanks, not a smile, not even a raised hand in appreciation from any of the nine people I went out of my way to help.

Who am I talking about? Horse riders.

Oh yes, I’m sure there’s going to be loads of horsey types outraged by me moaning about them, but you know what? Go and vent your outrage at the lumbering bit of soon-to-be dog meat that you have to clean, feed and muck out daily. I don’t care about your point of view.

What I do care about is what I see as an increasing amount of snobbery, or just bloody rudeness, from the horse riders I see round where I live in Lincolnshire.
Today was a prime example. Riding back to my place (which is a bit in the sticks) from my local market town is about six miles. I wasn’t speeding. I wasn’t winding on the 1050. I was actually bumbling along at a steady 50mph on what are mostly 60mph roads. The sun was out, it was a warm day and I fancied a bit of a steady one enjoying the British countryside. For most of it I had the visor flipped up. Life was good.

I saw the first couple of horses up ahead coming towards me so, as I always do, I hit the brakes, slowed right up, got in the very edge of the road opposite the lumbering bits of meat and the horses they were riding and trickled past on a virtually closed throttle to keep the noise from my bike’s totally legal exhaust as low as possible. I was doing no more than 8mph as I inched past the horses.

Nothing in response from either rider. Actually, not true. The first rider sneered at me. Perhaps they would have responded better had I flicked the bike down a gear and pulled a wheelie past them. Maybe they would have enjoyed that more. They certainly seemed to view what I did with a real air of pure disdain. I joke about the wheelie, of course. I actually love animals and I’d never want to upset one.

But that attitude of the horse riders continued. Each time I saw a horse rider it was the same routine with the same attitude back. Why?

Are they annoyed by the fact that bikers can use the road? The road we pay to use with our road tax, our insurance, our MoTs, our petrol tax, the VAT on it, the general cost of running a bike and all the protective clothing we need. Are they annoyed by that? Maybe that’s the reason for the sneering, they’re actually sitting there thinking: ‘You mug...’

Are we bikers like serfs to the horse riders? Probably.

Now. I’d be the first person to haul a fellow road user up and give them a piece of my mind if I saw them riding or driving in a way that would spook a horse. Anything with the brain capacity of a pickled walnut but the bodyweight of a small car that can be spooked by a plastic carrier bag stuck in a tree needs plenty of consideration from others on the road after all.

But come on horsey types, play the sodding game.

If I, or another road user, actually goes out of their way to help you, goes out of their way to make sure that your horse doesn’t rear up and kill you, then at least have the bloody common decency to nod or smile or wave a hand.

I know it’s a lot to ask but as you don’t pay road tax, insurance, MoT costs, petrol tax and VAT but do ride something on the road that will often leave a pile of stinking sh*t right where we ride (and don’t seem to feel the need to clear up after your horse either) don’t you think that a bit of niceness would go a long way?

Cue loads of pro-horse hate mail...

Have a safe ride... on either your horse or your motorcycle.

Tony